RU Alumni on Booster Repartee

Background: a sensible post on one Rutgers football board argued that consenting to play in yet another bottom-tier bowl game would result both in financial loss and a further decline in the university's academic reputation. Among the many spirited replies was this witty pictorial response:

We happened to overhear this entry being discussed by two alumni who attended Rutgers in the 1950s.

RU 53: Did you see that booster posting that George sent around to members of his class?

RU 58: I did.

RU 53: What did you think?

RU 58: Well, the spelling and punctuation show that the person never went beyond 3rd grade. What's he doing sounding off about how a university should be run?

RU 53: I suppose he might argue that he's a taxpayer. He might say that since his money goes to support the university, he gets to say how it's spent.

RU 58: That would be a spectacularly stupid argument. His money also goes to support the National Institutes of Health, but that doesn't mean he gets to tell NIH how to do its cancer research.

RU 53: Good point. Well, suppose that his schooling didn't stop at 3rd grade. Suppose he actually graduated from Rutgers?

RU 58: Impossible. That would mean that Rutgers is handing out diplomas to people who spell and punctuate like 3rd graders.

RU 53: It's not impossible. I'm afraid you haven't been keeping up. Incoming freshman don't have to take the Davis Test these days. If they did, the size of the student body would shrink by two thirds. Besides, you'll note that this booster isn't totally illiterate.

RU 58: How do you mean?

RU 53: Well, he spelled "dipshit" and "fucking" right, didn't he?

RU 58: That he did. I stand corrected.