Many readers of the
book Confessions of a Spoilsport have said their favorite
character is Paisano, the Rutgers student and football fan who
stars in Chapter 8, "I Am An Alumni!" For those who
haven't read the book, here's a sample of Paisano taken from
a Rutgers booster board, with original spelling and punctation:
"Im a freshman
and I live on Livingston. Livingston sucks, the only good thing
about it is you can park there and I could walk to the RAC. I
HATE LIVINGSTON, there is nothing to do, and everything is second
rate (aergo I applied to be a Rutgers College student next year).
Almost every obstacle has been placed in my way to enjoy myself
here. . . . My room is next the RA, the 4 other guys on the floor,
do nothing but sit around on Thur/Fri/Sat nights, they are against
parties and are antaganostic to people who enjoy them.
This is a microcosm of what is wrong with the the RU community.
Here at Rutgers we have a group (a vocal one at that) that want
to impose their will on the rest of the student body, these are
the same groups that are protesting outside of Brower everyday.
.. . They say (the people I live with) that these parties are
nothing more than LOUD music (no I dont live in a nursing home),
drinking, "slutty" girls and people acting stupid and
immature. DAMN RIGHT AND WHATS WRONG
WITH THAT? . . .
I have tried hard to meet people who like me (they do exist and
feel just like I do) like parties, booze, and chicks. I go to
frat parties almost every week, I went to almost every home B-ball
game and football game. . . . But these people make it hard.
On top of them, there is a SS-like police force here that go
around LOOKING to bust kids, and administration that is trying
to shut down what they consider a negative aspect.
Now these same groups are the ones hurting RU athletics. Groups
like the Rutgers 1000 are snobs who thumb there nose at athletic
achievement. If I had the pleasure of being an RU athlete I would
be personally insulted at the actions of this crackhead Dowling.
. . .
I was angered by the comment made in the Targum by some RU 1000
dork, who said that after seeing the workout video that the
Big east was a mistake and "the players are paying for it
with their lives." Obviously she has never participated
in any sporting competition and cant appreciate the hardwork
that athletes undertake. I guess she only values the hardwork
of studying for some calc exam. (There are
other things in life ya know.)
. . .
We need a stronger and more vocal student body that will fight
just as hard as the RU 1000 in favor of RU sports and "less
culturally valuable and wholesome activities." RU has to
be a place where were safe to have parties whenever we want."
Posted by RUPAISANO
--La fimmina e comu lu gattu: cchiu chi l'allisci, cchiu la cuda
crisci. Eng. A woman is like a cat: the more you pet her the
better she feels.--
Paisano had a friend named Fatbitch. Fatbitch posted on the booster
"That is the
kind of attitude that everybody should have at RU.
We need to send some advice to these RU .47 members
#1 dislodge the stick from your A**'s
#2 go to an RU Football game
#3 GET ROWDY!
#4 go to a party after the game and celebrate an RU Victory with
a nice cold Brew!
Posted by FATBITCH5
RU1000 argued that turning
Rutgers into a sports factory would draw more and more undergraduates
like Paisano and Fatbitch -- low-SAT students who walked around
talking about how Rutgers needed more "parties, booze, and
chicks." RU1000 argued that if Rutgers became a football
franchise instead of a university, it would start to resemble
low-level sports factories like UConn
and West Virginia and Ohio State, where students get drunk and
riot after games to show how much "school spirit" they
have, and feel cool because sometimes they actually get to hang
around and sniff the jock of a football or basketball player
they consider "popular."
celebrate basketball victory.
This was not, as it
turns out, an idle fantasy. It was happening all over the "Big
East" conference. At one "Big East" school, UConn,
students got pretty well known for getting blind drunk and rioting
and overturning automobiles and setting fires in the downtown
after basketball games. At West Virginia, they did the same thing
after football games. At Rutgers, the first sign that the "big
time" sports buildup was bringing increasing numbers of
Paisanos to campus came when the RU basketball franchise played
Michigan in Madison Square Garden:
Square Garden, where fans from the two teams were mixed together
in the same sections, Rutgers students were proud of having physically
intimidated Michigan supporters. "There was a brawl behind
me between two drunk RU students," one undergraduate reported.
"The Mich egghead fans were very scared all night. They
were literally afraid to cheer. The atmosphere definitely had
an edge to it. We have great fans and last night was awesome."
I didn't quite
understand why these students -- undergraduates, after all, at
my own university -- seemed so filled with pride about ugly or
violent behavior. But there seemed to be no question that they
were proud. "No fights around where I sat," one reported,
"but before the start of the game, there were many, many
chants on 'Michigan sucks' on the way up to our seats."
Another student was pleased by the atmosphere of intimidation
he and his classmates had produced. "I saw several RU younger
fans giving the finger to the face of the middle-aged Michigan
fans in the area," he proudly told the boosters. "Michigan
fans just walked away."
When the game
was over, New Jersey commuters got a firsthand view of the new
Rutgers that was emerging in the Big East era. There were numerous
fights on the New Jersey Transit trains taking undergraduates
back to New Brunswick. "The poor people in that train did
not know what hit them," one student boasted happily. "We
filled that train with scarlet and RU chants were started on
the train. One passenger who I was standing next to commented
that he hopes RU doesn't get too good, because it would make
their lives a living hell!! I thought that was great. I said,
'you better learn to love it. You better learn to love it'."
of these students to the rioters at UConn, or the Ohio State
students who set fires in downtown Columbus, needs no comment.
Still, Mr. Mulcahy and the Scarlet R boosters seemed to see nothing
wrong. Nor did the Daily Targum, which filled its next
day's issue with celebratory stories about "Scarlet Pride."
Nor did the sportswriters at the Home News Tribune, one
of whom quoted a Rutgers freshman as saying that, sitting there
in the stands at the NIT, he had felt for the first time like
he was "at a real university."
of a Spoilsport, Chapter 8
RU1000 also predicted
that students like
these would come to
dominate the university. Since Rutgers joined the "Big East,"
over 70% of New Jersey's top students have begun leaving for
out-of-state colleges. In New Jersey, more and more of those
who stay are choosing The College of New Jersey (formerly Trenton
State), which made itself into a leading public liberal arts
college by raising admissions standards and pursuing sports at
the Div III non-athletic-scholarship level.
The major worry, said
those familiar with RU's admissions statistics, was this: if
more and more "Paisanos" and "Fatbitches"
and "Foxladies" came, they'd drive out the dwindling
number of bright and intellectually engaged students entirely.
Then, with fewer and fewer top students applying, RU's rapidly
sinking admissions standards would drop through the floor. Within
a few more years of competition in the U. of Louisville-University
of South Florida "Big East," Rutgers would be left
with a student body made up of low-level open admissions types
who spouted obscenities and screamed about how anyone who wasn't
exactly like them were "brown nosers" and "losers,"
and how the high school classmates who left them and New Jersey
behind to go on to places like Harvard and Yale and Amherst "couldn't
Has it happened?
Well, there's no firm
evidence, but there's some. A Rutgers 1000 blog that takes comments
from visitors has drawn quite a few that seem to say a lot about
on campus. Most
were made in connection with a Rutgers 1000 Tee-Shirt Contest.
These writers do, at any rate, speak the Paisano-Fatbitch idiom
-- "dork," "brown nosers," "you suck,"
"fag," "losers," "tools," "get
laid," "talk shit," "dude," etc. --
and seem to display the basic mentality. Some (see "Adam,"
below) swagger around making ugly booster noises and thinly-disguised
threats. A sample:
Well, let's suppose
that things take their inevitable course. Every top student in
NJ starts to avoid Rutgers like the plague. The only individuals
who go there are the ones who couldn't get in anywhere else.
They talk about "brown nose" and "talking shit"
and "loser" and "fag" and "bullshit"
and "getting laid." They just love going to football
games. They love painting their faces and yowling from the stands.
Drinking beer. Then, after four years, the university formerly
known as Rutgers gives them a piece of paper.
What happens then? It's
pretty easy to say, actually. They become RU boosters, just like
the types who are thrilled about the stadium expansion and "Touchdown
Club" meetings and "How do you think we'll do against
Fresno?" and "We need more pass dee-fense," and
all like that.
But how do these people
live their lives after college?
We happened to run across
a page on a Rutgers fan site that suggests what the after-college
lives of RU boosters looks like. It seems pretty depressing to
us, but we'll bet it doesn't to "Mike B" and "Jock"
and "Foxlady" and "RU1000 SUCKS" and "Spanking
my Monkey" and "Adam." It's what they'll be doing
themselves in five or ten or fifteen years. Here's a link they
can click on:
Meanwhile, RUGLA and
Foxylady and the rest, let's keep those sparkling witticisms
coming in. They provide a great view of the world that "Big
East" sports are creating at Rutgers. We want NJ high school
students -- especially the ones with 700+ on the SAT math and
verbal sections -- to read them before choosing a college. If
they happen to be thinking of college as a time of inward growth
and intellectual development, preparation for a lifetime of future
learning, we hope it helps them make up their minds about the
"new" Rutgers. We do indeed.